


Only Kara Danvers

by shortstories13



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, I am reuploading this, i wrote this in 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:07:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29082111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shortstories13/pseuds/shortstories13
Summary: Kara identity is revealed to Lena in a very kara esque way and they have a conversation like normal people do.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 2
Kudos: 98





	Only Kara Danvers

**Author's Note:**

> OKK guys I edited this work, I am not writer in any sense of the world but I love these two characters too much. I wrote this whole story around the conversation which we never got to see on screen. Plz comment and tell me you liked it or not.

Lena was busy. For the past few days, she hasn't left her office except for few visits to her apartment where she goes to freshen up. She sleeps on the sofa but it's just for saying, she hardly had any sleep since the incidence. Yes, she was busy. She always makes herself busy when she is struggling like this. When something like this happens to her, she pours herself completely into her work so that she doesn't have to deal with all of her emotional baggage and it happens to her a lot, like the time Lex went to jail, or her mother tried to kidnap her. But god dammit! it wasn't working this time and she hates it. It always worked but this time it's different. 

The amount of pain she feels surpasses every other. Or maybe it's just culminated to a point where all the pain she put into her little boxes is trying to crawl out and scratching at her walls. It feels like betrayal. It feels like someone ripped her heart out of her chest, and now all she feels is this emptiness. For the first few days she cried. She cried her heart out. But after her tears went dry, all she felt this ache in her chest. Like she was physically injured. But now she feels nothing. Only Kara Danvers can have this effect on her. 

It was Saturday. Lena was leaving her office to go to her apartment. She gives jess a nod as she passes her in the corridor. 

"Jess you should also leave. Its weekend." she says as she presses the button of the elevator. 

"You are here Ms Luthor, so I should be here too "she says with a smile. Lena just presses her lips together. Jess has been the only constant in her miserable, pathetic life. She hasn't betrayed her YET. Or maybe she never allowed jess to get too close to her, That’s why. Cause people who get close to her either burns her or get burned. 

"Just leave jess. Its Saturday. You are too young to be married to your work. Go hang out with your friends or something "as the word friends leaves her mouth, she realizes how that word has lost all its value in just few days. 

Jess notice the changes in Lena's expression. 

"I will be out of here in few minutes Ms Luthor "she replies stopping Lena's train of thought as she didn't even hear the ding sound elevator made as it reached the floor. 

"Goodnight jess "she says with a faint smile.  
"Goodnight "she hears as the door close. 

One week ago- 

Lena was in DEO. They called her for an analysis of some samples they found. Lena helping them has become a normal thing. 

She was just finishing her work and saw Supergirl and Alex talking to each other in the corridor. It looked like they were bantering about something. Even before coming to DEO on regular basis, Lena knew both of them were close. She can never relate but she guessed they were co-worker and people tend to get close working in close vicinity for some time. 

She notices the crinkle on Supergirl forehead which was all too familiar and cute. She is not blind to appeal of Supergirl charm even when they were *fighting* and now Supergirl and her have mended their relationship to some extent, there was one less reason to hide her attraction to the caped hero. But something made her uncomfortable the more she looked at the crinkle. 

The way they were talking in comfort, the familiarity and all of sudden her heart starts beating faster. Alex says something and Supergirl pushes at her shoulder lightly looking at her shoes. 

All the pieces align themselves and Lena suddenly stands in her chair and then it hits her. OfCourse Supergirl notices the sudden movement. She looks at her with a puzzled look, the crinkle becoming more visible. 

Lena turns in her heels rushing towards the exit of this god forsaken building but her cursed heels doesn't allow her to move fast. 

Supergirl chases after her, Alex just quizzed at the rapid reaction. 

"Lena.??"she shouts behind her. 

Lena just keeps walking faster which she makes her look like and idiot in heels. 

She finally caught up with her but now they are right in the middle of the deo. 

Nobody knew what happened between them. They just stares at them awkwardly trying to mind their own business but also trying to know the reason behind the kerfuffle. 

Lena just ignores everything and just wants to get the hell out of this –place.  
Supergirl caught her hand from behind. There are tears in her eyes now. 

“Lena ?what's going on?” she asks gently. 

Lena doesn't know where to focus. Everyone staring at them, the gentleness of the hand, alex panicked look or Supergirl or should she say kara’s eyes. 

“nothing” she decides. 

“well, there is something, why don’t we talk somewhere private” 

It hits her that despite being in her Supergirl attire, this is kara . And it makes her jaw clench more tightly. She doesn't know how she looks but kara must saw the change in her demeanour and her hold gets gentler and her eyes become softer. 

“lena .. pleases let’s talk somewhere private. please” Lena takes a deep breath trying to control it which had become more sporadic. Her agitated looks becomes cold and distant.  
.  
" leave my hand kara" she says in a very dangerous tone. For a second there is pin drop silence. Kara’s expression goes from denial to disbelief to pleading. She doesn't want to make a scene which Is impossible now as everyone is staring at them. But still. 

"Lena......you know?"kara says gripping her hand more tightly. The grip is becoming borderline painful but Lena declines to show the weakness and remains expressionless. 

“Let me explain … please “ Kara looks hurriedly from Lena to Alex and the Agends who still doesn't know the reason of any of this. 

“I said leave my fucking hand !!!“she all but shouts at her face. THAT WAS DEFENLTY MAKING A SCENE. 

She never saw so much hurt in Kara’s eyes. Blue eyes filled with so many tears. 

Lena leaves as soon she releases her hand. Nobody knew what just happened. Everyone around them looks at them open mouthed. 

She hears chatter behind them one she leaves the corridor and Alex shouting Supergirl . 

Once in her car , Lena releases the breath she was holding but all that comes out is a whimper. 

Now- 

She was leaving the L-Corp building and looking into her purse for the car keys, when saw a familiar figure leaning against the wall. It was a little dark to see, but She doesn't need an x-ray vision to see who it was. 

Kara was wearing a blue cardigan matching her eyes with pants, one hand fiddling with glasses (those damn glasses). Her normal chirpiness was gone. The bright and shining smile was nowhere to be found. Lena hates herself for reading kara so easily or that it just so easy to tell her state of mind by just looking at her. Lena hides her everything behind many layers makeup and expressions that it's hard to even tell herself what she is feeling. 

Kara gave her a weak smile. Lena's heart skipped a beat. Any other day that smile was the highlight of her day.  
But today it just made lena clutch her purse more tightly in her hand. 

It was the first time lena saw kara since the incident and now that she knows the truth, she can see all the similarities between these two people but yet somehow also can see the differences. 

Supergirl has all the confidence kara doesn't have. Supergirl is the mascot of all that American bravado with bright primary colours screaming at your face. She is all that self-righteousness with a penchant of doing the *right and moral* thing but kara is just kara . Her kara ,the mildly mannered, newbie but promising career ahead, cardigan wearing, fiddling with her glasses when nervous kara. 

Kara has always been there for her, and Supergirl well she was just not on Lena's favourite list lately. And that what hurt the most, knowing these two people were the same. 

Lena wondered if it had hurt less if she would've have found the truth the other way around.  
For the past few days, she keeps thinking if it had hurt less if she had found that kara is supergirl not that supergirl is kara. If her reaction would have been the same. Well now she will never know. Now all she knows is that they are the same person. 

"Hey" kara spoke softly waving her hand awkwardly. 

"Kara" lena replied in a cold tone, coming back from her thoughts and starts moving towards her car. 

"I just came here to see you. I knew only you would be in your office on a Saturday evening" she tried to joke and gave a soft chuckle. But her smile didn't quite reach her eyes, like it used to. Lena ignored the sadness in her eyes. She was angry at her, she told herself and has every right to be, but seeing kara like this. God! it's just not fair. 

"How are you" kara spoke again. 

"Why do you care "she said still not looking at her. 

"I do care lena .. I will always care." 

"Well good to know that. Now if you will excuse me, I have places to be" 

"I needed to see you, to talk to you." kara said in a tone that can break anybody's heart. It took everything in lena's body not to react to it. 

"I think we had plenty of talks in last 2 years but now I don't have anything left to say to you. "she replied accusingly and then started looking around for her car in the garage. She held her keys and pressed the button and the car made a sound. She started walking towards it but kara grips her hand abruptly. 

"Lena please it's been a week. We have to talk about it" she said not realizing that she was holding her hand. That was their first contact in a week. 

Lena has always been a person who didn’t like physical intimacy. When she was younger it was easy, her family is not the most touch loving one or even loving one. They never showed their love by touching or kissing or hugging. Her father would sometime pat her back to congratulate her. Lex would mess her hair “You did great ace”. Lillian rarely said anything but did smirk when she became valedictorian crushing her rival's daughter dreams. 

But it all changed when kara came, as many things in lena’s life did. Kara is very touchy person and not in a weird uncomfortable way. Like talking very animatedly while using her hands, hugging tightly whenever leaving or greeting her. Kara entire persona was sunshine and bright. It's easy to get lost in her warmth. That should have been the big red sign if lena wasn’t such a touch starved lesbian. 

Kara's hand was warm. For a second it reminded her of all the nights they spend cuddling on the sofa watching movies on nights like this.  
But then Kara realizes what she did and she releases her hand abruptly. Lena tightly shuts her jaws and tries not to remember that day. 

"I am sorry ...so sorry "she starts apologizing. 

Looking at her hand as if she had hurt her. For a second it was that kara again. Lena knows that kara well, who apologizes for small things. 

She takes a deep breath and again starts to move towards her car, kara follows her. It looks like she can’t ignore this conversation. She had practiced her tirade when she was drunk out of her mind, but that was before ,she actually saw kara. 

"You know... all my life people have judged me even before they knew me. The second they hear my name they make assumption about me." She all but points angrily with her finger . Kara takes a few step back.  
"They think they have figured me out in a second. About what I have done or what I can do. I was okay with that I mean of course; It took me a long time to be okay with that but I didn't care." Lena looks at her with hard expression on her face. 

She continued "But you kara ....you have done something more appalling than those people. You made me trust you. . You made me think that I was more than my name..that you were my friend..I thought you were my friend "She finishes with her sagged shoulders. 

Tear starts forming in Lena eyes. She curses inside her mind. She didn't want to cry anymore. After taking a deep breath to stop herself to full on bawling again. 

" At least those people never pretended to be something they were not "she looks at kara whose blue eyes were also filling with tears. 

"I am your friend Lena "she replies trying not to cry but failing. 

"Please kara .... just please stop."lena says feeling defeated and now sitting on the floor of dirty garage in a dress that cost a fortune, curled with head on the knees to somehow hide from kara. 

"I don't have the energy. "she didn't. She was exhausted mentally and emotionally. After few seconds she felt kara sitting by her side. Both of their backs supported by her car. Only kara Danvers can do this to her. 

If only if she were a few seconds early she could have saved herself from all this.She thought to herself but well kara was a literal superhero who can fly so she don't know how she could have avoided her.  
Thinking to herself she spoke after few seconds. 

"god... I was so ignorant. . All the facts were before me" lena said gesturing in the air. 

"I knew deep down...on some level. Of course,... you would show up the second Supergirl leaves. And vice versa, and that time when I dreamed that you were carrying me...god I feel so stupid "she says laughing at herself, at her stupidity and ignorance. Self pitying.

"I just never wanted to accept the truth. When all the things were pointing to the obvious, I was ignoring them. And I call myself a scientist..."she huffed. 

Kara beside her didn't stop staring at her " you were ignoring them because you weren't ready for the truth. Just as I wasn't ready to tell you. I knew what it will mean for both of us if the truth comes out." 

When Lena didn't stop her, she continued. "I couldn't tell you in the beginning. Then we become friends and the more time passed the harder it got to tell you. You told me how hard it is for you trust people and I just kept thinking that I don't want to lose you. I was afraid to lose you." She says looking at her hands in her lap. 

"I know it was so selfish of me think this way but I loved what we had. You were the only one who didn't know about my other. You know. so, I was just me with you and You loved kara the nobody reporter. I didn't have the weight of the world on my shoulder."kara gave her a smile and for a second Lena relaxed a bit. 

"and our friendship.." Lena hears that word her expression again hardens. 

"What friendship kara ...friends don't lie to each other. They don't go to this extend to hide the truth." 

"I was trying to protect you " 

"Oh please. Will you stop with that already? For god sakes don't give me that bullshit" 

"That's not it lena.. that's the truth." 

"I think me being a Luthor is enough reason for people to hurt me. You can't add more danger to that"  
Lena gets up more infuriated than before and now just wanted to get away from there. Kara gets up too. 

"It's not like that Lena and you know it" 

"I don't know what I know or don't know anymore. Just leave me alone." 

"I have lost so many people in my life since I was 13 years old. My whole planet died in front of my eyes." kara begins again. 

Lena tries to turn around so that she can get away from there. 

"Lena please..."kara pleads with hand on her shoulder and slowly she turns and for the first time lena sees kara practically begging her with her eyes. She folds her arms at her chest in a defensive manner. 

"When I came to earth, I was lost for a long time. My mother send me here with a purpose and I lost that too. When I became Supergirl I found some purpose but that meant that I saw more people lose their life in front of my eyes OR they had to leave me. Especially people close to me" kara voice cracks. Lena expression softens a bit. 

"I couldn't do anything even with all these powers and sometimes even after doing everything, I couldn't save them. Some of them died in my arms. Others have to say goodbyes because I couldn’t keep them." she says looking at her hands. Kara face was red, she had a horrifying expression on her face. She was on the verge of bawling in the middle of her parking lot. 

Lena can't even imagine how many deaths kara has seen in her life. The pain it leaves behind.  
At that moments all lena wanted was to hug kara but didn't. She can understand the weight kara was talking about. The fight to be better, to do good and lena has always done that because of the guilt of her last name, but kara do that just because she can, not that anybody expects from her. But it was weight nevertheless, the weight of the world that can crush you. 

"you think that ..losing so many people will somehow makes it easier, that I will know how to cope with it. But it doesn't. It doesn't get easier, and I think it never will." 

Kara kept looking at her hands. The hands which can bend steel but right now they felt soft when lena took one in her own. 

"But there are some people in my life lena that I don't know ...if something happens to them. like if something happens to alex ..I don't think I can survive that. I just ... can't." Her voice broke. 

Lena craved to hug kara. 

"You are one of those people, you have become my family ...and Rao if something happens to you because of me, I would not be able to live with myself. I dreamed that once...it made me so scared..I woke up crying and covered in sweat” and with that Lena touched kara’s cheek. 

She leaned in her touch. It was just a soft gesture. It wasn’t anything like they both weren't used to but it was a start. 

"So It's not an excuse. It's the only excuse." 

kara looked in her eyes and her crying stopped a little. They both were silent now slightly leaning in each other, back against the car. Not saying anything, both exhausted.After a long moment kara stood up and gave her hand for support for lena to help stand too. 

"But I understand you anger too. I do ..I am not here to tell you that you shouldn't be angry with me. OR that my one speech will make things better. I am here to tell you that you are my friend, more than friend.” 

For a moment lena’s heart skips a beat. 

“You are my family and that means I will always be there for you even when we don't talk " 

Lena didn't know what to say to that so kara smiles softly. "I meant it when I said that I will always protect you.No matter how long it takes for you to look back, when you do, I will be here." 

And with that Kara moves to grab her purse from the floor and starts moving towards the exit.  
Lena just stares at her slightly open mouthed and dumbfounded. 

" call me when you are ready” she shouts from the exit gate and waved her good bye.  
Leena opened the door of car and starts the engine. She looks at her rear-view mirror of car and sees a smile on her face for the first time in a week. 

Only Kara Danvers can have that effect on her. Only Kara can break her heart and know how to mend it slowly.

**Author's Note:**

> The show spent 4 years going back and forth between lena and her supposedly turn to become evil which became boring at some point. I really loved the first couple of episode of s5 and think the show should have let them kiss when their conflict solved . But anyway there is like 1 in 100 chance that they will become canon but this is my contribution to this lovely fandom.  
> come chat with me if you like @shortstories-13 on tumblr.


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